Feels that she has trust issues. So how does she deal with it? Or how can she deal with it?

Was randomly talking to the sister yesterday. She was like mapping out my life plan for me. Wonder if it'll work. The only way to know is to talk about it with him. Will I sound like I'm presurrising him if I were to do that? I wonder. But I don't even know how to start the topic. Dangs~

He's back! :)A day out with him today. Went to watch Alice in Wonderland 3D. Simple but not fantastic. Johnny Depp was as usual, terrific. :)

Went to try Manhattan Fish Market. They should not put the teriyaki sauce with the fried salmon. The salmon will taste much better without the sauce. :) maybe the other dishes will be better? It was so cool seeing the crew blowtorching the prawns right before serving.

It doesn't matter what we do, but it's the time spend together that matters. :)

Glad that you're back home safely Sayang! My stress reliever. :) You'll never know how much I've missed you!! *muacks*

He's coming home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tonight!!!!!!

I can't contain my excitement at all! :D

I wish I could fast forward the time.

See you later Love.

Why do I keep having the uneasy feeling? I guess he wanted to share with me the fun time that he was having. But hearing that it was happening, it was wild. It just made me feel super uneasy.

How like that?

I'm sorry.

I'm feeling downright emotional after watching Episode 12 of Hi My Sweetheart. I cried so much that all I wanna do is to cry and cry and cry.

For such true love to exist, it is ever possible? Or does it only happen in reel life?

Whatever it is, I hope that Akhim Sayang is safe and sound. I didn't hear from him last night. And i've yet to hear from him tonight. Hope that he's ok.

For those who have been reading my entries, you'd realise that undeniably, I'll never fail to mention abt him in every entry, at least, even if it's just a one liner.

He means the world to me. Sayang, if you're reading this, I love you!

And I miss you like crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It felt wonderful. A pseudo gathering. I want a proper gathering. Not gather when someone is getting married or getting engaged. A BBQ perhaps? :) I love reminiscing the good ol' memories. It's amazing how a group of people, even though they have not met for so long, but when we meet up, it doesn't feel awkward at all. So loved!

The time with the other 3 was fun! And dear friend, treasure the mini heart2heart talk. Hope you'll do well k? And what's past is past. You might not be reading this, but just to let you know, that I treasure you very much as a friend. If there were moments that I might have offended you or anything like that, do forgive me too. I wish you the best of luck for all that's happening in your life. :)

And Akhim Sayang, glad that you're fine and your foot is ok. Counting down to Saturday. I will surprise you at the airport k? Even though, I know that sub-consciously and secretly you might be hoping that I'll be there. Hee~ Can't wait for your return. ("v")

When I don't get to talk to him, I feel sad. When I get to talk to him, I feel even sadder. Gosh. I think the reason why I feel sadder when I get to talk to him, is the voice clips that he sent thru msn. It has this tugging feeling in my heart.

He said that he'll prolly touch down between 2000hrs and 2200hrs on 6th March. I told him to update me on the flight details. I'm going to make some time to go down to the airport to pick him up. By hook or by crook. I was not able to send him off, but at least I should be able to pick him up rite.

Take care Sayang during your 4D3N field camp. Make sure I hear from you again when you come back from field camp on Wed k?

Spending time with the girls makes me feel so loved. They never fail to make laugh my hearts out. Enjoyed every single moment with them.

I feel so loved. :) Very much. Thank you Sayang, for taking the time to give me a call otw to the night market, and otw back. I was so touched that it made me weep after the phonecall. Short, but very much treasured. Good to know that you're safe and sound! *hugz*

First day w/o the Love. Apparently, he didn't seem to receive my smses. Reception must have been really sucky huh. :(

There is free Wi-Fi. So he logged on to MSN, and to save cost on his part, he sent voice clips over, wanted me to do the same thing too. But the stupid mics that I had in my cupboard couldnt work without a sound card. And so, here I am on the comp, but on MSN via my hp. Just so that I can send voice clips over to him too. Heh!

I shall rush down to Popular after work tmr, to get myself a mic. Haha! Lime Juice said that if it's not this late, she bet I would have rushed out to get a mic there and then. Hee!

Love you Sayang. You take good care of yourself k? Drink loads and loads of water! *muacks*

All your bags are packed, you’re ready to go
You’re standing there, outside your door
Please wake me up, just to say goodbye
But the dawn is breaking, it’s early morn
The taxi’s waiting, and he’s blowing his horn
Already, I’m so lonesome, I could die

So I’ll kiss you, and smile for you
Tell you that I’ll wait for you
Hold you like I’ll never let you go
Cause you’re leaving on a jetplane
But I know you’ll be back again
Oh baby, I wish that you need not go

Every place I go, I’ll think of you
Every song I sing, I’ll sing for you
When you come back, we can down to the beach

Now the time has come, for you to leave
One more time, I wish, I could give you a kiss
Just close your eyes, and you’ll be on your way
Dream about the days to come
When we won’t be left on our own
About the times, that we’ll be here to stay

So I’ll kiss you, and smile for you
Tell you that I’ll wait for you
Hold you like I’ll never let you go
Cause you’re leaving on a jetplane
But I know you’ll be back again
Oh baby, I wish that you need not go

Adapted from Leaving On A Jetplane

Had such a wonderful day out today.
Went over to Jurong to wake Mr Army Boy up. :) Such a sleepyhead he is. Heh~

Chevron's SAF E-mart was packed with half-bald guys. Haha!

Managed to watch Valentine's Day with the Love. It was not that bad a movie. Storyline a bit simple? I'm not sure. Interesting. But it felt kinda messy. I preferred He's Not That Into You. Heh~

He's flying off on Monday morning. Gosh. I'm going to miss him so, so much. Sayang, take good care of yourself ok? And make sure you come back to SG in one piece, safe and sound, small and round. Haha! :p And ingat pesan I k? Will always be praying for your safety and well-being Sayang. U'll be missed much! *muacks*

I guess just a moment of not thinking about it eases my mind a bit. It just takes some positive energy to let go of the negative ones.

I'm learning to let it go. I'm learning to be more supportive. I'm learning to be more of everything. I'm trying my best still.

For the first time in a long time, I responded when he spoke about the job. Heh~

I love you! *muacks*

Why do I feel this way?

I guess work has drained all my energy.

Even if so, is it that boring to be out with me?

I guess he's brain dead too.

But then again, I found it offensive? Hurtful? To hear "aarghh. sian ah" when you're right next to me.

Maybe I'm thinking too much. Maybe I'm taking it too emotionally.

Go ahead and lead your life. It's all yours. It has always been yours. But will I be able to handle it? I shall question myself. And I will continue to question myself.

Thanks for the great evening my Lil Misses. Better late than never. :)

And oh, we totally forgot a group photo!! :( Boo!

Spending time with them has always been great. Much loved!

It's been ten years now. Our friendship has definitely gone a long, long way. With conflicts and misunderstandings etc. But each and every time, we grew out of it, becoming stronger than ever.

What a great Saturday it was! No doubt that more than half of the shops islandwide closed early as it was eve of CNY. Nevertheless, our plans still managed to pull through.

It was supposedly an advance V-day celebration. Ala, I think for us every weekend seemed like a special day. Haha! It just gave us more reasons to do something fun.

First up, it was the trip down to Singapore Science Centre, to visit the long awaited Body Worlds. I'm so happy! :)

Finally, managed to visit the exhibition before it goes away. Enlightening, interesting. Even though Akhim said that after that, it reminded him of the school days and he thought that he had an information overload. Haha! And oh, with my Passion card, we managed to get a cheaper entry! Fantastic or wat? :p

And we were so hungry after the Body Worlds and Science Centre, that we looked like we haven't eaten for 5years. Bought a double Cheeseburger from Mac for the Love and we slumped down by the roadside with a can of Grass Jelly. Kesian, anak sape je tertinggal kat tepi jalan. Heh~

Next up, was the flyer. But we were tooooo hungry! So we just had to grab a decent, proper meal first. Went to Bali Thai at Suntec, but oh my goodness rice. The variety was tet! The price was even more tet! I guess it was because it was CNY eve? But then, this Akhim of mine, just had to verbalise that he is craving for Turkish food at Arab St, when we were already sitting down and given the menu.

Cabbed over to Arab St (that without the surcharge was only $3), and cabbed back to the flyer after dinner. Dah feeling kaya lah nie dua budak. Padahal, padahal.

WOOHOO! Boarding the flyer made me feel like as if I was boarding the aeroplane! Haha! And he seemed more excited than me! It was such a great experience. And oh, there was a mysterious phantom in the flyer who finishes up other people's drink! We had a bottle of Pokka Milk Coffee and we placed it on the floor next to my bag. And ho ho ho, there was suddenly this Indian little girl who squatted in front of our bottle, and happily drank up the coffee, till no drop was left. Tsk tsk tsk. What if we had some infectious disease? What if the drink was drugged or poisoned? Good luck to her man.

Anyway, it was such a great night out! :D Never been happier. Woohoo~

Thank you Sayang! Thank you for the effort, thank you for the planning. Thank you for everything. Next time round, kalo kita celebrate, I nak big, big present k? Maybe a life size doll of yourself! Whahahahaha!

What a happening weekend it was! :)

With Lil Miss Schizophrenia's sister's wedding. It was great, just great. The deco was great, well, to sum it all up, it was superb! Congrats Kak! :) May you have a long lasting marriage ya? Wish you all the happiness in the world.

It was a heated debate that we (the lil misses + pratap + Akhim) had at the coffee shop table. And the topic: marriage. It was interesting to get to hear and know that TOTALLY different perspectives and views that males and females have with regards to marriage. But above it all, I felt that the lil misses helped me to open the topic with him, coz I'm not sure how I'd be able to do it myself, given the current sticky situation that I'm in. I'm just hoping and praying for the best.

Prawning thereafter. After the lucky streak of prawning that we had the last round that we went, this time, it was such a slow start that he was so pissed and annoyed. I kept telling him that my songket kebaya is scaring all the prawns away. Heh~

And great, after knocking into a cupboard door in the office on Friday, it left a beautiful mark on my forehead. Woohoo!

OOOOOOH~ Charco's, Charco's.

Finally got the chance to dine there. :) But the serving was so much, I became tired of chewing. Haha! The ribs was good, but it made me discover that perhaps, I can't eat too much lamb. Heh~ Coz after eating it, it spins my head right round, right round.

Have always enjoyed spending time, sitting down and chatting away with Lil Miss S. Too bad that you had to go and I had to pee so badly, or I would have stayed longer. You take care k? You're old enough to decide what is the best thing that you should do. But whatever it is, I'm always here for you! *muacks*

Alright. We actually booked a pair of tickets for this movie, thinking that it will be one good movie. The story behind it, was okaaaay....The ending of the movie, TET! After all the tension-building scenes, the ending was rather flat, I must say. Then again, it's subjective. I didn't get to watch the first 5minutes of the show though. We totally missed it. Then again, I doubt it has much significance. Heh~ So if you really want to know, go ahead and watch it. But a tip, watch it on a weekday so it won't be too painful on your pocket. Then again, if you have loads of $$$ to spare, then go ahead. :P

Oh, but the waiting was madness. He was late. Oh well. I have never spent so much time at arcades before. Hung around at the arcade at AMK Hub for an hour. Travelled down to Suntec and hung around at the arcade for another hour. Gosh~

Local talent is really good. :) More publicity should be done for them. It's a waste.

This blog carries so much memories. It's like a glimpse of my life since goodness knows when. Heh~

Been a somewhat crazy, but not so crazy week at work. Next month might be Woohoo~ If you know what I mean. Working life is never easy. The mistakes that you make carry gravity and it's harder to cover your own ass, unlike when you're still studying, and nobody really cares because at the end of the day, you will only have yourself to answer to. But working life, you deal with the lives of human beings. Challenge it is.

I'm excited, cos Lil Miss Sunshine is getting engaged! :) I'm so excited for you, darling. Can't wait to see you on the special day. Hope that the preparation has been alright. Don't be too nervous alright? Dah engage, then tak lama lagi, ke jinjang pelamin lah ni. :) Tup tup, anak sepuluh. Hahaha! Taklah, just kidding. :P

Arcade action was fun. Fun way to destress. More of it please, aunties.

I think I miss playing the drums. Played the drum thingy at the arcade. Haha! And it made me to miss it. Mummy, can I have a drumset for my bday this year please? Pretty please? Please ah, favour ah.

Sayang's going to Thailand with the army peeps sometime next month. :( I think I'm going to be such a zombie when he's away. Boo~ Sayang, nak ikut boleh? Your duffer bag very big rite? You think you can give me some space in there, and bring me along to Thailand? I promise I'll be good. *doe-eyed look*

I think I'm tired. I'm tired of having to wait and wait. Got ready and everything, and 'the' mum had to make so much noise, till he has to cancel the plan. And to make it worse, I was all ready to leave the house. How great is that? So here I am sitting in front of the computer, all ready to go out but stuck at home. This is not the first time. I would have thrown a bigger tantrum if I had left the house. Well, I guess i'm just going to leave the house and wander around for a while. Have lunch on my own or something.